In 1954 Graham Sutherland was commissioned to paint a portrait of Winston Churchill, the Prime Minister who led England through World War II. Upon its completion, the first person to see the portrait was Churchill’s wife, Clementine. In her assessment she said, “It looks really quite alarmingly like him.” However, when the portrait was presented to Churchill his reaction was different. He was deeply upset. He decried the painting as “filthy!” He said it made him look “like a down-and-out drunk who has been picked out of the gutter.”
Eventually Clementine had the painting destroyed.
The artist in me grieves for poor Graham Sutherland.
Churchill saw an uncanny portrait of himself. It was jarring and uncomfortable. But he refused to be forced out of the house of mirrors. Although others felt the portrait was an accurate depiction of him, Churchill preferred a less authentic portrait of himself he held in his mind.1
In the same way, we can choose a less authentic portrait of joy. It’s easier to embrace a reductionistic picture. We prefer joy to show her best side, under the right light, all smiles—a filtered selfie of joy. But as I write in my book:
A more accurate portrait of joy includes the pang—the inconsolable longing and unsatisfied desire that accompanies her. This challenges portraits of joy that focus exclusively on her lightheartedness. Some authors hold forth an impossible task of being joyful and positive all the time. But what is missed in these perspectives toward joy is how she buoys us and cuts through us all at once.2
A More-Honest Portrait of Joy
We kick off The Joy Refuge by getting existential. We are going to explore questions like: Why does joy exist? Why is joy so elusive? And, what does our longing for joy, and even our joylessness, teach us? Think of these questions like paintbrushes and the answers you discover as the paint. By the end of this week, you’ll have a more-honest portrait of joy. Unlike Churchill, I hope you’ll like what you see.
If you haven’t started already, it’s time to begin reading Longing for Joy: An Invitation into the Goodness and Beauty of Life. This week we will work through Part 1: Longing for Joy. You will read the introduction and five chapters. Don’t stress! The chapters in my book are intentionally short and sweet. They take an average reader about 12 minutes to read.
Monday → Introduction and Chapter 1: Presence
Tuesday → Chapter 2: Cultivation and Chapter 3: Absence
Wednesday → Chapter 4: Joylessness and Chapter 5: Longing
Thursday → Chapter 6: Wisdom
Of course, you can pace yourself however you want. But try to have finished these five chapters by 5:30pm PDT on Thursday October 3rd for our Virtual Q&A on Zoom. If you can’t, just try to read Chapter 1, 5, and 6!
While you’re at it, go ahead and register for the Q&A and add the date to your calendar! A reminder will be sent on Thursday morning too.
Before you pick up the book: Grab a pen, or open a note on your phone. Here’s something to ponder:
What is joy? And, why is joy so elusive?
Don’t over-think it. Jot down what comes to mind. Ponder it on your own terms. I’d love it if you share your thoughts in the comments below. Let’s chat about it. When the week is over, you’ll get to look back and see if/how your answers have changed. We’ll also talk about these questions at our Q&A on Thursday.
Grace and peace to you this week!
P.S. If you’re receiving this email but didn’t sign up for The Joy Refuge, my apologies! You can remain subscribed to Ordinary Matters and remove yourself from The Joy Refuge emails by updating your subscription settings. If you’d like to join along, message me, and I’ll send you a free digital copy of the book.
This story is quoted from Rhythms for Life: Spiritual Practices for Who God Made You to Be, Chapter: Inward.
This quote is from Longing for Joy: An Invitation into the Goodness and Beauty of Life, Chapter 5: Longing.
What is joy? And, why is joy so elusive
Joy is that emotion/feeling/state where in that particular moment – everything is right in your own little world. No concern for how we look, no worries about family or friends, no apprehension about work, no negative thoughts about money issues, no thoughts about the state of affairs in our city, country or the world etc. You are just wrapped up in whatever you are doing at that particular moment. I don’t agree with you when you write “A more accurate portrait of joy includes the pang—the inconsolable longing and unsatisfied desire that accompanies her. This challenges portraits of joy that focus exclusively on her lightheartedness.” Joy is no longer joy when this longing and unsatisfied desire appears. It becomes something less than joy – mere satisfaction or something even less? - Ken Broadhead
Not to be overly spiritual about it but I think Joy is a fruit of the Spirit, and is elusive in good part because the Spirit is. There are patterns and ways of participating with both, but neither can be captured or altogether “figured out”, or something like that.